Anyway, I was talking to my friend about the RWC opening fter the night was over and we both agreed that it was very uncomfortable and disappointing. Uncomfortable because, as we were both Christians, the whole scene of excessive partying and drunkeness made us feel out of place as we were sober and tired. Disappointing because there were older, more 'mature' people who were comaed out or needed help to stand up. It made me sad seeing an man in his 60's surrounded by gaurds or people doing pitiful things because they were on the influence of alcohol. All we wanted to do was get home and drink tea, and I think we would have been happier if we left town early and did that instead. It reminded me that as Christians, we are supposed to be in this world but not of this world. We are supposed to feel uncomfortable and out of place amoungst a scene like Auckland city last night because it does not align with what we stand for and who we believe in.
I'll admit I am being pretty darn judgemental and hypocritical, but I'll also admit that I am just like those people on the streets and I am no better than any of them. I drink, I sometimes smoke, I have taken drugs and I have been drunk on occasions to the point where I coma out or do embarrassing things, too. It is said that because I do those things, I am a backslidden Christian and some might even say that I do not love God because of it. The last statement is extreme for me. I'll admit I am backslidden, but I am convinced that I do love God. It's hard because when people find out that I do or have done these things, they straight up judge me or tell me to stop but never ask me why I'm like this. Ever since I was 14, I have been doing illegal and shameful things. Before I was 14, I grew up with a dad and family who made me feel depressed. It's also not easy when all your friends you love do it. It's not easy breaking a habit which has loved me and destroyed me. I can relate to Paul when he said in Romans 7:15, 'I don't really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don't do it. Instead, I do what I hate.'
On the other hand, God has really been working in my life ever since Bible college and I can see tangible changes in my heart already! It's really exciting. He's stripping away those desires to drink and take drugs and such because He is filling that void in my heart with His love instead. I'm learning not to want to be more or have more, and that is freeing. Although, it will take a very, very long time and I know I will fail at times. Good thing my God is a patient one!
The last thing I want to say is, please, if you are the praying type, pray for my friend Lyndon and his family who were hit by the bus last night. His little brother is going through surgery on his leg, but the rest of the family are not too physically hurt, just shocked. Thank you so much if you do.
And also, Showbread and Ascend The Hill have been added to the Parachute festival line-up next year along with The Almost and Relient K. Oh my goodness I am so excited! This is the best line-up ever!
Okay, that's all for now folks <3
Currently listening to: The Naked And Famous - Spank
