Taking a deep breath.

I am unofficially graduating Bible college in less than two weeks! While I will miss studying there as well as the amazing people, I am so ready and excited to embark on new adventures. However, I don't know what that adventure is just yet. I seriously considered studying theology at Victoria University in Wellington, but after getting down on my knees and praying about it, the 'yes' that I so wanted to hear from God settled into a clear 'no.' And somehow, I felt a great peace about that no. I asked my best friend to pray for me and see what God was saying to her about my future too, and she gave me an account of what had happened the next morning. She asked God, 'Do you want Jenny to study theology next year?'
'No.'
'Do you want Jenny to study at all?'
'No.'
What do you want Jenny to do?'
'Start soon...start now...Come&Live.'
Come&Live are a non-profit organization that works hand in hand with musicians that they sign and help them spread the kingdom of God through loving, giving, sharing and reviving. I have considered and researched the internships that they do but never imagined that this is what God would want me to do. The catch is, they only take 12 interns and they are based in Nashville, Tennessee...in America. Seeing my surprise, my best friend added, 'But you have to get an answer for yourself.'

That night, I got down on my knees again and asked God, 'Do you want me to do Come&Live?'
The answer came immediately. 'Yes.'
Just to make sure, I rebuked any satanic or demonic forces and my thoughts that were influencing this answer. And I asked God not once but three times if this was really His will for me. You could say that I couldn't believe it and my questioning Him was really a tactic to allow this answer to sink in for me. Finally, after manifesting and speaking in tongues, I heard Him say, 'Go in peace. I will pave the way for you.' Immediately, I thought of the words spoken to Joshua by God in Joshua 1:9:

'Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.'

I then asked God when I should start, and I really felt that it was in six months because He had said, 'Start soon.' I saw encouraging visions soon afterward that made me feel so at peace with this answer and revelation.

As huge a news as this is, I still don't want to take any chances and put a toe out of God's will for my life. My mum, who I asked to pray for me, said she had prayed for me to make the right decision and we had a good talk today about this situation. She said a really encouraging thing to me. She said that when she prays about my little sister, she gets the feeling that she will be a pastor's wife, serving and helping people. But when she prays for me, she gets a different vision. She feels that I am going to be active in bringing people into God's kingdom, like a tool He uses anywhere He wants to use it. I asked her, then, why she felt surprised and worried when I told her that I might be going to the US and she answered me with solemness, 'Because you are so young.'

I really feel that God has equipped me with gifts and a unique way of thinking that will prepare me for anything that God has appointed me to. I have thought about this a lot, and although I am scared if this is all to be fulfilled, it's the good kind of scared. The kind of scared that you feel when you are about to parachute off a plane. The kind of scared that you feel when you fall too fast down a waterslide. The kind of scared that you feel when you are about to embark on a new adventure, as I am doing now. Two things need to happen before I am to internship at Come&Live, however: First, that a trusted mentor of mine prays and gets confirmation from God that this is His will and second, that I, of course, get accepted as a intern at Come&Live. 

It feels like I'm taking a deep breath before the dive, and it's a good kind of scared.

Currently listening to: Jon Foreman - Your Love Is Strong