Because my view of relationships between a man and a woman have been screwed up, I didn't have the desire in my heart to marry or to have kids and that sort of thing. I once thought that this was the normal in romantic relationships- the man has the dominant power, the woman serves him and has his children and that's it. I hated that the man had the control because I am all for woman power and I hated that all the woman did was serve and did what the man told her to do. Was this how a relationship in the world was supposed to be? A relationship based on what's normal in society, rules and obligations? I have found that the result of such 'love' is hurt, abuse, anger and disrespect, especially for women. This makes me very upset. Needless to say, my view of relationships sucked!
But then my friend told me something that changed that. A relationship between a man and a woman shouldn't be developed out of obligations and 'you have to do this' or 'I want you to do that.' It's supposed to be done out of a mutual love and respect for one another. For example, a woman may say to a man: 'I'm going to make you dinner not because I have to or because you told me to, but because I love you and I want to do this for you.' Or a man may say to a woman: 'I'm going to buy you this gift, not because you told me to or because you are hinting, but because I adore you, value you and love you.' Isn't that beautiful? Isn't that something you crave? To actually live in a relationship based on genuine love for each other, not simply rules, is to rare to find but so worth fighting for.
What if the messed up relationships and marriages we see around us is in fact, abnormal? What if a relationship based on pure love for each other is the norm? To me it makes perfect sense. Because God intended it that way ever since the creation of the world, but the way relationships are now have just gone way off track to how He planned it. We were made by, for and because of love. What else are we living for?
I have a little spark in my heart now to maybe one day find and settle down with a man who will treat me out of love and vice versa. It is very, very miniscule, but this new perspective of love has got me excited. Just keep it quiet okay :)
Isn't it fascinating that it also applies to our relationship with God? He has given us His love letter, the Bible, not to hold us down from living life, but because He wants us to have life overflowing with blessings, joy and peace! His commandments aren't to see us suffer and burdened, and they are definitely not said with thunder and lightning and wrath like some think. They are said out of love, because God IS love, so why would his words not be of love too? Out of this pure love He has given us His Word, and out of love we obey them. Not out of obligation or even fear I think, but out of a mutual love and respect: 'I choose to obey your commandments, not because I have to and your Word tells me to, but because I love you and I want to please you.'
I'm excited! I pray that this passion and this realisation will keep burning in my heart. Thank you Father for this love.
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