Confessions of a date-less 18-year-old.

I have this hollow feeling in my stomach again. Like something should be there but it isn't.

Lovesick, again. Listening to cheesy love songs, again. Feeling lonely, again.

I am tracing this back to my relationship history, which, if you want to be logical, is non-existant. I always think there is something wrong with me for being single my whole life. Being 18 and seeing all my friends my age in relationships and out of relationships all the time makes you wonder why you havn't been in one either. I have thought of many reasons why this could be: I'm too picky, I'm frigid, I'm scared of committment or my relationship with men in my family have made me have trust issues. It could be any one of these, but I think it is mainly because I havn't found the right guy yet, the one who I will like enough to pursue. I think if I find the right guy, I will feel completely myself around him. I will feel comfortable but also beautiful and good. There's a reason why I havn't had a boyfriend yet, and I have come too far now to start dating guys who aren't right for me. The guy I will date will be worth the wait and the bouts of loneliness. He will be worth every guy I didn't date, and more than every guy I wanted to.

If you have a similar dilemma in your life, or just have trouble with boys in general, a good friend of mine gave me some great advice which has helped me a lot on this fustrating journey.
She went to a conference one day and one of the women that spoke told her that one day, she wrote down a list of the essentials she needed in a man. She prayed over that list, and a year later she met her husband who ticked off everything on that list. I encourage you to do this too.

Write down the essentials you need in a boyfriend. By essentials, I mean cut out all the silly things like nice clothes, plays in a band or smells good. Surely you don't need those things in a guy. I mean things that a guy has to have for you to be able to really date him. Examples would be: he needs to have a relationship with Jesus, he needs to have dreams and goals in life, he needs to be patient, he needs to be honest etc. Once you have thought carefully about that list, it really narrows all the guy options you have in your life a whole lot more. Personally, when I had trouble figuring out if a guy was worth my time or not, I would look back to the list and check if he had most of these things. If he didn't, I knew what to do. It helps to pray over that list and see what God can do. He might just surpirse you.

I am still waiting for my guy to come. I have this thought that when you meet the person who you will one day spend the rest of your life with, you will know it. You won't have logical explanations or a solid reason for it, you just know.
How would you know when you meet the right one?

Listen to: The Postal Service - Such Great Heights