A time you thought about ending your own life.

I had heavy depression a few years ago when I had family problems and had a hard time dealing with my past and forgiving certain people. I also felt incredibly lonely and felt like life was not worth living. I used to sleep all day and night, too tired and sad to go to school and not communicating with anyone. It was during this time I thought a lot about ending my own life. However, it was also during this time I was emailing my best friend about all of this. If it wasn't for her and her encouraging words of hope, it would be possible I wouldn't be here right now. She helped me get back on track with God, even though it took a long time. She once said to me, 'Don't lose hope. It's the anchor for your soul.' And in the end, I never did. Another thing that helped me get better was music, particularly Underoath's album Define The Great Line. I related to the album more than I related to anything else at the time and felt comfort and solace in it. If you are also struggling with depression, I encourage you to find support, even though you don't want to. I didn't want to talk to a councillor or get any proffessional help and still don't, but I talked to a friend and that was the best thing I ever did to help this pain.
I still have mild depression and think about ending my life at times, but I have hope now. I have forgiven those who hurt me and my past no longer has a strong grip on my life anymore. It doesn't hurt me to think about it. I still consider myself somewhat lonely in the sense that I don't like people very much and prefer spending time with myself than being around people. If I do spend time with people, I am quite picky about it. I have good friends but they can only help me so much. I actually think I wouldn't mind if I didn't have any friends. I consider myself very independant.

Listen to: Underoath - Salminir